Radiance
by Dreams-of-Red
Summary: Ayame/Ritsu, shonen-ai. A light fic, Ayame's thoughts, and a confession from Ritsu. They never had a scene in the series, so this is a what-if. My very first one-shot, be nice and review ^^


AN: It killed me that Aya and Ritsu never had a scene together in the series. They are so cute! This fic is a short sketch to something more complex, that this will hopefully inspire, and that I will write when I have the time. Fluffy shonen-ai ness!   
  
The night was cool. Ayame sat on the edge of the porch and looked out on the darkness, his long hair occasionally catching snatches of moonlight to turn it to liquid silver. His knees were drawn close to him, and he was leaning his head against wood post that supported the roof over the traditional japaneese porch. Thoughts ran through his head, deeply serious, like the velvet night. Alone, his other side surfaced. The one that longed for approval. Beneath the loud confidence in which he basked during the hours of sunlight.   
  
Hattori always saw through it, and knew his true feelings accurately most of the time. So did Shigure. The two of them were always his safety net. Comfort and Rationality. He wasn't lonely when they were around. And yet... There was still Yuki. Yuki, who he coldn't seem to ever approach in the right way. Whom he had failed. He forced his mind away from this as he looked up at the stars.  
  
A sudden yelp, from the roof, and a small figure came crashing down to the ground, sending up a small cloud of dust. Large light brown eyes peeked up from where the boy had landed on his feet and forearms. Ritsu's cheeks flushed bright crimson and he would have stammered an apology if he had been able to through his embarrassment. Ayame was startled, but had enough composure to pull himself together, falling into his usual boyant insensitivity.  
  
"Hoho, Ritsu? Falling off roofs is bad for your health!"  
  
The boy's eyes widened.  
  
"Did I worry you?? Gomen nasai!!!"  
  
He crawled over and clung to the bottom of Ayame's red kimono.  
  
"Forgive me! It's completely my fault!!ThetruthisIwasjustsittingontheroofandsawyouandIjustleanedoveralittletoofar, isweariwasntspyingoranything.."  
  
He paused for breath while Ayame took the opportunity to sweatdrop. But, before Ayame could protest this, he was cut of again.  
  
"Gomen! I'm probably bothering you right now, you obviously wanted to be alone..and,"  
  
"Stop apologizing!"  
  
Ayame cut him off, leaving Ritsu in a slightly aweful silence. One of two people who could manage to bring Ritsu out of hysterics, and the only one to do it successfully without rendering him unconscious from his pressure point.  
  
"Gomen."  
  
It was whispered, he couldn't help throwing one last word in, and he looked down, blushing more, after. Ayame put a long-fingered, pale hand on top of the younger boy's fair head.   
  
"Heyy, don't sweat it. We all can't be perfect all the time...Well, of course I can, but thats much different. You shouldnt set your aspirations so high at your young age."  
  
He winked good-naturedly when Ritsu blinked up at him meekly, then sat back on his heels, his hands in his lap. He was dressed in a very pretty kimono himself, a girls, with a ribbon tying his hair back, which he was at the moment tugging loose to let his long hair fall over his shoulders and shadow his face.  
  
"I..."  
  
His voice was soft. Ayame leaned back on the post, the picture of lazy elegance, and looked at Ritsu with languid gold eyes. He had dropped the over-presumptions, high-energy front. His confidence remained, though, ever present and showing through in the smirk he wore so casually.  
  
Ritsu couldn't speak. He was so painfully shy by nature, and around Ayame, whom he had really liked for such a long time, it got much worse. He was envious of Ayame's confidence, his strength, his peace of mind. He had never seen Ayame ever apologize for anything. When he was around the man, he felt that it reflected on him, just a little, and weeks after their meetings he would feel a little better about himself. He had been told it was hero-worship, but he really thought his feelings were more sincere then that. Despite the age difference. Ayame was special.  
  
But of course, Ayame didn't see him in the same way. How could he? Ritsu really never thought that anyone could possibly like him. Nervous, shy, clumsy, at times uncontrollably hysterical.. He was quite a mess. He smiled a little sadly at the thought.   
  
"Hm? What are you thinking? Don't keep it all to yourself over there."  
  
"Just...I...I wanted to tell you..."  
  
Ayame listened, not too intently, but listened. He knew that Ritsu was capable of saying what was on his mind. And he wouldn't help him with this one, though he knew, really, what he was about to confess. Ritsu was sweet. Ayame did feel compelled towards him, but, it wasn't serious. He was just looking for something solid to cling to, and Ayame was pretty damn solid. Assured. A lighthouse in the storm of Ritsu's mind. Whether or not he really was a lighthouse didn't matter around Ritsu. He saw what he chose to. Not that bad of a quality, if you thought about it.  
  
"T-that...Anou...well, you probably know that I've...liked you...for a while..."  
  
It was so painful-looking, this confession. Ayame felt a twinge of pity for the boy. It was so hard for him to express himself, Ayame couldn't imagine living like that. He himself always spoke his mind...he didn't see what Ritsu found so hard. But perhaps that was just his own narrow view. Empathy wasn't a quality he possessed in great quantity. He was more likely then not blind to the feelings of others. It made things easy for him. Like now, looking at Ritsu, that child-like apprehension, a need to be loved, so like his own, that he kept secret.  
  
"I know."  
  
Simple. An acknowledgment. Ritsu looked at him, silently, for the span of about 5 seconds, then quickly hid his face, but not before Ayame had glimpsed tears starting to well up. He reached out to touch the younger boy's shoulder, but before he could, Ritsu stood up, and ran in the opposite direction, leaving the white ribbon he had in his hair behind. Ayame picked it up and walked after him. He would stop eventually, and by the time Ayame got there his composure might have been a little more steady.   
  
He found him at the edge of the forest, leaning on a tree, in better condition. He was sniffing, and his shoulders were trembling a little, but other then that, he wasn't out of control.  
  
"Gomen ne..."  
  
Sniff. It was quiet. Ayame put his arms around Ritsu, and felt him go a little limp at the gesture. Relaxed into Ayame's arms. After a few moments, Ritsu turned to face him, and his arms loosened, hands going to Ritsu's tearstained face, wiping away the salty streaks from his soft cheeks.  
  
"I shouldn't have..I know that you have Hattori, but.."  
  
Ayame silenced him, this time with a kiss. It was a kiss filled with sunlight, a light summer affair. Ritsu thought he would faint, and as it was became very light headed, opening his eyes again (he hadn't realized they were closed) to darkness, surprised that it was there at all. It seemed like the spot they were standing on should be glowing with the warmth he suddenly felt.  
  
The silver haired man smiled. An understanding passed between them, a mutual need. However, it was obvious to them both that perusing this glow would be a failure. Ritsu took a step back, blushing only faintly. He didn't say a word, and simply smiled back, basking in Ayame's calm light.   
  
"Thank you."  
  
It was quiet, but well placed. Ayame nodded, and waved to Ritsu's retreating figure as he turned and ran off again, back towards the house. Leaving Ayame alone once again in the velvet night.   
  
AN: This. My first one shot. It was harder then I thought it would be. I don't think I like it that much u.u Oh well. I'll be trying again soon.  
  
T.T Post-writing of this fic, I searched for a title and came up with the perfect one. Turns out its a soap opera. ::goes to her corner and cries:: Radiance is only my second choice. ::sniff:: 


End file.
